If you’re planning on divorcing in 2014, make this your New Year’s resolution: keep calm during your divorce negotiations!
Divorce is a difficult time that can be traumatic for many people. When we decide to divorce, it’s normal for hot-button issues to come up that strain our emotions and bring out the worst in us. Negotiating who gets what can quickly take its toll and cause us to lose our patience.
No matter the circumstances of your divorce, you don’t have to go it alone. The divorce attorneys at Cortez & Hoskovec, LLC can guide you through every step of the New Mexico divorce process. We’re effective negotiators who protect your rights throughout divorce.
How to Keep Calm During Divorce Negotiations
Marital property, pensions, custody—these issues often bring emotionally-charged debates to divorce negotiations. What’s worse, sometimes a former spouse will bring anger and resentment to the negotiating table. When having a heated discussion during divorce negotiations, remember these tips:
#1 Don’t rehash the past. Your relationship is over. The best way to move forward is to avoid blaming your former spouse for the divorce by rehashing the past. Check your anger at the door and do your best to ignore any attempts by your spouse to punish you or hurt your feelings.
#2 Be assertive. On the other hand, you also don’t want to be a pushover. Make sure that your needs are expressed in an assertive manner. Focus on providing important, relevant information to your attorney rather than fueling negative emotions.
#3 Don’t be too attached to assets. Sometimes a person fights tooth and nail to keep a marital home, only to realize later that they cannot afford it on a single income. That’s just one example of the countless assets that couples can fight over. Remain focused on the bigger picture and ask whether keeping an asset is good for your long-term financial interests.
#4 Let us do the talking. When an issue becomes heated, your former spouse lies and you just want to scream, don’t! Instead, let our divorce attorneys do the talking. We’re skilled negotiators who deal with heated negotiations every day. We have the skills to bring reason back to the discussion so you don’t have to make decisions when emotions run high.
#5 Seek counseling. Divorce can be so hurtful, sometimes we need a little help getting through. By speaking with a counselor, you’ll be able to let out your feelings and discover new ways to cope so you stay on track and have a successful resolution to your divorce.
Focus on a brighter future and you’ll gradually see the wisdom in remaining calm during your divorce negotiations.